Questions To Ask Yourself About A New Partner

  1. Can you state particular characteristics of theirs that you love?
  2. Can you give examples of them?
  3. How many essential characteristics of your "ideal partner" do they have?
  4. Do they think it's a wife and mother's right to decide whether to work at a paid job?
  5. Are they willing to have you spend time alone, even if they would like to be with you?
  6. Are they glad you have other friends?
  7. Are they pleased and proud of your accomplishments and ambitions?
  8. Do they think women can and should be as wise, worldly, confident, strong, decisive, and independent as men?
  9. Do they ask your opinion?
  10. Do they both talk and listen?
  11. Do they tell and communicate with you when they are hurt?
  12. Do they think it is okay for them to show they are weak or vulnerable and to cry sometimes - aside from right after they have abused you?
  13. Are they able to express affection aside from they times they are sorry for abusing you and when they want to have sex?
  14. Are there some special traits about women (ability to express emotions, willingness to be vulnerable) that he admires?
  15. Do they like and admire the women in their family?
  16. Do they have good friends?
  17. Do they have interests besides you?
  18. When they are angry how do they express themselves?
  19. Do they lose their temper suddenly over small things, expecially when they don't perform as well as they would like?
  20. Do they ask you about other men in your past life?
  21. Do they want to know where you've been when you've been out?
  22. If you stay out late, do they insist on an explanation?
  23. Do they believe they should make all the decisions?
  24. Do they think there are any circumstances in which it is okay for a partner to hit their partner?
  25. Are they jealous of your friends or relatives?
  26. Do they think you're with someone else if you're not home when they call?
  27. Do they think you're going to cheat on them when you talk to someone else or interact with someone else?
  28. Do they get angry when meals are late?
  29. Do they have traits that often hook you into involvements with abusive men?
  30. Do they take over when you're having trouble doing something, whether you want them to or not?
  31. When they hurt, do they act angry instead?
  32. Do they silently sulk when angry?
  33. Do they drink or take drugs at all?
  34. Do they ridicule you for being stupid or for characteristics that are "typical of women"?
  35. Do you like yourself less than usual when you're around them?
  36. Do they sometimes put you on a pedestal, saying they don't deserve you?
  37. Are there some qualities you especially like about yourself that they disapprove or ridicule?
  38. Have they been in fights or previous abusive relationships?